Love is Like a Vending Machine
Uploaded by Appleman on Feb 02, 2012
A love-sick psychiatry patient is told by his doctor that love is like a vending machine. Unable to comprehend this philosophy, he approaches a vending machine to see if it could be true, but will love blossom?
SCENE 1
INT. PSYCHIATRISTS OFFICE.
29 YEAR OLD CHRIS IS MEETING WITH HIS PSYCHIATRIST. BOTH ARE DRESSED SMARTLY. THE PSYCHIATRIST IS SAT BEHIND HIS DESK, OPPOSITE HIS PATIENT.
Psychiatrist
Don’t worry, we all have these anxieties from time to time. It’s human nature.
Chris
I know, but all I want is to be loved. What if no one ever loves me?
Psychiatrist
That is something you don’t need to worry about. There is someone out there for everybody, but for some people it takes longer for them to find that someone. You just have to be patient.
Chris
But I’ve been waiting patiently for so long. I’m thirty next month, and I’ve never even been kissed! There has to be something wrong with me!
Psychiatrist
The only thing that is wrong with you is that attitude. It won’t get you anywhere.
Chris
Well what am I supposed to think?
Psychiatrist
Well... Think of it this way; when you want a drink, and you choose to purchase a drink from a vending machine, you have to put your money in and press the right buttons to get out of it what you desire. It's not just going to give you that drink. It’s the same with love; you have to go out there and find a vending machine, put in your money and press those buttons...
Chris
Right...
Psychiatrist
Well, our time is up for this session. I’ll see you same time next week. Good luck.
CHRIS AND THE PSYCHIATRIST SHAKE HANDS AND CHRIS LEAVES THE ROOM. HE WALKS INTO THE WAITING ROOM.
Chris
Love’s like a vending machine! Ha! The guy’s a joke!
CHRIS NOTICES A VENDING MACHINE IN THE CORNER OF THE WAITING ROOM. LOOKING AROUND, HE SEES THAT THERE IS NO ONE ELSE IN THE ROOM, SO HE APPORACHES THE VENDING MACHINE. HE HESITATES, LOOKING VERY UNCOMFORTABLE. ENTER NICOLA FROM BEHIND HIM, SILENTLY. SHE IS A PRETTY WOMAN, IN HER LATE TWENTIES.
Chris
Hi! I’m Chris...
PAUSE.
Chris
That's a nice colour on you, picks out your eyes...
Nicola
Are you getting anything?
CHRIS TURNS AROUND SHARPLY IN SURPRISE.
Chris
Um... Hi! I was just, um...
Nicola
Talking to a vending machine...
Chris
I was fixing it... I work here.
Nicola
Really? Oh, how come I’ve never seen you in any staff meetings?
Chris
Because, I...
Nicola
Because you’re a patient here...
Chris
Um... What makes you think that?
Nicola
You were talking to a vending machine. That’s...