Growing Up in a Household wit han Alcoholic Parent
Alcoholism
Growing up in a household with an alcoholic parent results in one of the most strenuous relationships that a child can face. Not only do the children have to deal with their own problems as they grow up, they feel the added responsibility of helping their parents function on a daily basis. There are steps that children can take to help their parents achieve sobriety while learning about alcoholism themselves. First and foremost is helping parents face the fact that they do have a problem. Secondly, children can encourage their parents to consider Alcoholics Anonymous, and finally help keep them focused on the twelve steps of Alcoholics Anonymous.
Unfortunately alcoholics say over and over that they can control their drinking. They say they only drink because they are under pressure, they had a rough day at work, they are going through a rough relationship, or one of a million other excuses. In reality, none of these excuses are true; they drink because they cannot face their problems without the alcohol. "A frequent component of the disease is the alcoholic's belief that drinking is necessary to cope with life. In an alcoholic's confused mind, the need to drink may literally seem like a matter of life or death"(www.alcoholics-anonymous.com). The child in a relationship with an alcoholic parent must realize that alcoholism is a disease, and not a question of willpower. This realization not only helps the alcoholic parent, but the child as well because the child realizes that the parent is not drinking to hurt them, but because they just cannot control themselves.
Another pivotal point in the relationship between the child and alcoholic parent is getting the parent to attend AA Meetings. The parent may have tried many, many times to control their drinking on their own without success. This often leads them to frustration which they see as another excuse to drink. The child may at times find it difficult to admit that their parent is an alcoholic and go along with their excuses to drink. This only makes the child an "enabler" which means they enable them by believing their excuses. After a child sees so many binges, so many broken promises, so many lost jobs, relationships and so much instability, they realize they must get the parent to see that they need help. They need the structure that AA Meetings can provide. Where other people with the same...