Infidelity in Men More than Just Sex
Infidelity in Men: More than Just Sex
The subject of infidelity is a frightening one to me. I have only been unfaithful once, but I remember it vividly. The thought that I could do something like that to a person that I cared about is depressing. Although I can clearly depict how bad cheating made me feel, I cannot explain why I did it. The best reason that I have been able to come up with is physical pleasure. The idea that I could betray somebody that I loved troubles me, but even more troubling is the prospect of infidelity in my own marriage. As a twenty-year-old, it is hard to imagine spending fifty years with only one person. I want to commit myself and have a family, but I worry that I might make a stupid mistake and tarnish a hopefully wonderful relationship. These worries have prompted me to investigate the reasons that men decide to have extra-marital sex.
Although most research points to the idea that while women enter affairs for emotional reasons, men have extramarital sex for purely sexual reasons, I have concluded that a large part of a man’s desire to be unfaithful results from emotional causes as well.
Gender-Based Differences
According to Cathy Young, “gender differences in sexual attitudes and behavior are much more dramatic than in virtually any other area.” Men cheat on their wives at much more alarming rates than women cheat on husbands. More than half of all men are suspected of cheating on their wives at some point in their relationships.
Most theorists suggest that the reason men tend to cheat more lies in a fundamental difference between the sexes. This difference can be manifested in a number of ways, including “in attitude towards the whole sexual experience. Whereas most women tend to view sex as an aspect of love and emotional intimacy men tend to see it in the same way they see going out with the boys and having a few beers… as a way to have a good time.” Some theorists suggest the idea that “men in our society generally draw a sharp distinction between physical sex and emotional love, whereas most women do not draw such a distinction; for them physical sex and emotional love are the same thing.”
The question of whether these sex differences are genetically or societal-induced is not important for this paper....