Jumping in to Marriage Too Soon
Jumping in to Marriage Too Soon
When people are young and in love, I do not think they fully realize the work that must be done to make a marriage last. It is said “a marriage may be ‘made in heaven,’ but the maintenance must be done on earth”. Couples must constantly be thinking about their mate and that what they do always influences the marriage, in one way or another. I for one, did not really understand what it took to keep a marriage going. Marriages must be cultivated and worked at, just like a garden, to keep them fruitful and lasting.
When I was nineteen, I got married for the first time. I was, or so I thought, totally in love with my new husband of twenty-one. I moved from San Jose, California to Detroit, Michigan, to be with him as he was from there. I had no experience in cooking or cleaning as my mother took care of those things while I was growing up. When I got married it was such a shock to realize how much work went into those things. It was so bad that I did not even know how to boil water. My poor husband also did not fully realize that I had absolutely no experience in the kitchen or in the house. The first time I tried to cook, it was a disaster. I remember I cooked tacos, rice, and beans. Everything was burnt or under-cooked. I did not even know how to mop a floor or clean a bathroom. Those first few months were such an adjustment for us both.
My husband also had some adjustments to deal with. He had been living at home, just as I had, and had been able to spend all of his paycheck on himself. He had no one to answer for but himself. He now had to start paying bills, rent, and car notes. He also had to give me money to buy groceries. The first paycheck he gave me when we were first married was so difficult for him. He now could not buy the types of clothes and shoes that he was used to buying for himself. He had to start thinking of me too. It hurt him so...